Do you expect too much of yourself? Are these expectations stopping you from being happy? The good news is you can work on making yourself happier. You can do this by learning to interpret things differently. This will result in you experiencing negative events that are less likely to cause self-defeating thoughts and negative emotions. 

We offer mental health support for Selby and the surrounding areas. Why not give us a call? Our phone line is open from 7 pm – 10 pm, 365 days of the year.

Call us on (01757) 642 399. If you call before our phone lines are open and we cannot answer you will be diverted to an NHS Helpline.

When you feel stressed or anxious, your brain makes you look at the world in a certain way. It tells you how people should behave and how the world should work. It does this by introducing what some psychologists call the “Must filter”. In other words, your brain tells you that the world must work one way, and people must also behave one way. 

Below you will find some musts that you could change to help improve your mental health. 

I Must be Successful in Everything I do

When you set yourself up to be successful in everything you do, it can cause you to feel anxious. In addition to this, it’s likely that you will procrastinate because you have high expectations of yourself. Did you know that the most successful people try and fail multiple times? This is because they learn from their failures. Try not to be successful in all that you do. Instead, think about how good your life could be because you have limitations. 

I Must be Loved by Everyone

It’s only natural that you want everyone to love you. However, when you constantly try to please others you become something of a chameleon. You lose sight of what is important to you because you focus on what other people want. In reality, this behaviour will never make you happy because you cannot always make other people happy. Think about how you can be kind to other people without the need to be loved by them.

I Must Avoid Conflict

Avoiding people who can be hard to deal with might seem like the safe thing to do. When you avoid these people, you’re less anxious and you dodge those negative emotions. However, avoiding all of these things is just a temporary measure. 

Everyone will encounter some sort of conflict in their life. There will be misunderstandings, disagreements, and stress. Facing conflict might seem impossibly hard to understand. However, communicating with people you avoid can lead to a happier life. This is because you’ll become better at dealing with situations that cause you anxiety. In addition to this, the more experience you have with these situations, the less bothered you will be about them in the future. 

 

We offer mental health support for Selby and the surrounding areas. Why not give us a call? Our phone line is open from 7 pm – 10 pm, 365 days of the year.

Call us on (01757) 642 399. If you call before our phone lines are open and we cannot answer you will be diverted to an NHS Helpline.

Interested in helping those who are struggling with their mental health? We offer Mental Health First Aid training in Selby. Contact us at info@communitea.org.uk